I was bopping around yesterday and replying to comments on my Dear Diary post. Ann, from Coupons Deals and More, inspired me to reveal something I invented a while back. Its still in the beta stages (you know, since it doesn’t work yet) but its going to be all the rage amongst the BBW community. I have wanted to bring this dream to life for a long time. Check out my pitch:
When you see a skinny heffa who’s in need of fat. Just look at yourself, you know where its at. Why are you standing there just being greedy, sling that fat over to the needy!
The Fat Slinger 3000
As you can see by the picture, we are still working out the schematics of it all. You simply connect The Fat Slinger 3000 to the target area and it sucks out the fat and slings it to the target area of the person who is in need aka The Skinny Heffa. Now how awesome is that? Do you know how fast skinny heffas would have to run. I know it seems like us big girls can’t run but its all a lie. We look like we can’t move but in all honesty, we have cat like reflexes resembling that of a puma. Yeah we fast! There is not a person alive that could outrun me if I were given the opportunity to sling fat at people. Oh and don’t worry big gurls (yes gurls), the fat is non-returnable. Ha ha ha skinny heffas thought they found a loophole! Not! I have been fat for too long to let you heffas one up me!
So how about it, how many Fat Slinger 3000s can I put on back order for you?
{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }
YAY! I get a commission!!
There is not a person alive that could outrun me if I were given the opportunity to sling fat at people.
I cannot stop laughing…
Ok, I am in the hills of Tennessee at breakfast falling out of my chair – these people think this city slicker is nuts laughing so hard at her laptop!
Girls you ARE gonna be rich!!
LOL
Ha ha … love it!! I can hear your jingle getting stuck in my head already
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What about us fat guys needing to remove the dunlap. I mean those skinny, buff and all in between need a solid forty pounds of jiggle. So if you will 2 Fat slinger 3000′s, stat. I just finished a triple meat triple cheese with a side of fries and onion rings. Damn t
hat’s a lot of fat to sling. Well someone has to be your guinea pig.
You, dear sir, can be my prototype. Although, for eating all that stuff while I had a chicken sandwich and a taco is a violation of your vows and for that you should have a limit on the amount of fat you can remove. I like my men a little meaty!
Alecia, you must remember the jingle so we can sing it around people and make them want it. This is the only way we can get into production lol!
Ann, we must get that Dian! She can fall out of a chair and still be the only one laughing. If I fell out of a chair, my hits on youtube would be off the charts! Grrrrrrrooooooowwwwllll!
Kudos on the Fat Slinger 3000, I love it!
I will be responding to you this evening by the way.
JNESS
Oh my goodness, Thank you so much! I cannot wait.